Season of humility

Nunc Coepi- Now I begin.

My season of Humility is now. With a family of 6, my husband and I share responsibilities that many outsource, alternating the day to day tasks of caring for our four children ages 10 to just under 1. While he seems to effortlessly get through meal preparation, dishes needing to be cleaned, and shuttling our kids around the many ways I keep them out of the house, most days I feel coming up far too short, and barely staying afloat. Most of the time when it's my turn to be home, I quickly give in to exasperation, with frustration and exhaustion early on. I just can't seem to manage the little tasks that seem to never end, at least not with the love God desires of me.

Humility seems very countercultural. Society teaches one should try to build themselves up to be the best they can be. In essence, this results in status and power. Kids go to school and are taught they can do anything. They are also encouraged to be popular, or the top of a class. Unconsciously we grow wanting to prove ourselves as worthy. It is a shock to one's system then when reflecting on the teachings of Christ which says to become a servant. Paradoxically, even amongst our most loved ones such as in the family structure, we can fight against this. I have often been heard to cry out, "I am not your slave!". I progressively become louder and less patient as each day goes by as I want to be seen. I am looking for one's gratitude or at least to feel validated, that this is where I'm supposed to be, and making a difference.

As Catholics, we must teach one another how it's ok to be unnoticed. Rather than expect acknowledgement and praise from the World, what is most important is the opinion of God, who sees us in secret. The Saints are a prime example of emanating Humility, mimicking as best able that of their Rabbi, Jesus Christ. Mary, Queen of the Universe, and St Joseph, are a model as well of service and relentless love for each other. Throughout history, others have prevailed through, teaching that true love exists for its own accord. Rather than seeking to be looked at in return, each day I have with my family is a new chance to begin again, to serve man through love each as if God himself.

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Help me, to mimic your ways, asking for nothing in return. 

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